Place to Read the Important Information About How to be Happy October 7, 2008
Posted by janey in : achieving happiness , comments closedLife does not always give you want. And because of the lack of manifestations of their desires, many people felt empty and unhappy about life. Thus, if you want to stay happy in life, there is one thing you need to know and accomplish with ease, to love and appreciate yourself.
If you look carefully in life, it is not the lack of those materialistic things in your life that makes it miserable.
Indulging in materialistic items may seem as one of the ways to stay happy. However, you know that happiness obtained from those items is only temporary.
True and genuine happiness arises from you working inside out, not outside in. Being happy is an inner feeling and it does make sense to work out the issue from the place called ’self’.
Unhappiness usually stem out of your lack of self esteem and self appreciation. At home, your parents have taught you to appreciate others and be grateful to people who assisted you along the way. You are taught to say “Thank you” to others, present gift to others as a token of appreciation etc.
However, have you been taught how to appreciate yourself? How to acknowledge your own success and give praises to you? Do you love yourself for who you are?
To love is to accept. More often than not, we tend to choose what we want to accept about ourselves:
Talents
Strengths
Ability…
However, that is not love. Ask any parents or a couple deeply in love, they will tell you that they will accept their children or their spouse as who they are, for their strengths and weakness.
Others like you for your strengths, well your loved ones love you for your weakness.
To choose to only accept your strengths is definitely not one of the many ways to stay happy. No one can seek to be perfect in this world. In fact, it is human for you to be imperfect!
And because of lack of self love and self appreciation, it resulted in you having to seek affirmations from others by indulging yourself in the role of the victim where you will do things to:
Gain other people’s attention
Gain others’ sympathy
To affirm yourself that you are not capable or lovable…
The truth is your improvement will be much faster and greater when you focus on your successes, your wins and the things you do right rather than overly concerning yourself with your past mistakes.
Thus if you want to stay happy, stay in love with yourself!
Invest 15-30 minutes every night and review the successes you accomplish in the day. I call it the “Appreciate Self Game”.
And like all other games, this game also has its own set of rules:
Write out at least 10 accomplishments for the day
Do not repeat the accomplishments from the previous days. By not repeating your accomplishments, it forces you to be more aware of your different successes and winnings in the day.
Self appreciation and self love is not something you want to eliminate from your life if you want to stay happy, constantly.
Learn more about emotional freedom technique courses.
Life Direction With Life Mapping June 17, 2008
Posted by janey in : achieving happiness , comments closedSuccess is more than economic gains, titles, and degrees. Planning for success is about mapping out all the aspects of your life. Similar to a map, you need to define the following details: origin, destination, vehicle, backpack, landmarks, and route. See more at get organized.
Origin: Who you are
A map has a starting point. Your origin is who you are right now. Most people when asked to introduce themselves would say, ìHi, Iím Jean and I am a 17-year old, senior highschool student.î It does not tell you about who Jean is; it only tells you her present preoccupation. To gain insights about yourself, you need to look closely at your beliefs, values, and principles aside from your economic, professional, cultural, and civil status. Moreover, you can also reflect on your experiences to give you insights on your good and not-so-good traits, skills, how to organize, knowledge, strengths, and weaknesses. Upon introspection, Jean realized that she was highly motivated, generous, service-oriented, but impatient. Her inclination was in the biological-medical field. Furthermore, she believed that life must serve a purpose, and that wars were destructive to human dignity.
Destination: A vision of who you want to be
ìWho do want to be?î this is your vision. Now it is important that you know yourself so that you would have a clearer idea of who you want to be; and the things you want to change whether they are attitudes, habits, or points of view. If you hardly know yourself, then your vision and targets for the future would also be unclear. Your destination should cover all the aspects of your being: the physical, emotional, intellectual, and spiritual. Continuing Jeanís story, after she defined her beliefs, values, and principles in life, she decided that she wanted to have a life dedicated in serving her fellowmen. For more on life direction visit this link: life direction.
Vehicle: Your Mission
A vehicle is the means by which you can reach your destination. It can be analogized to your mission or vocation in life. To a great extent, your mission would depend on what you know about yourself. Bases on Jeanís self-assessment, she decided that she was suited to become a doctor, and that she wanted to become one. Her chosen vocation was a medical doctor. Describing her vision-mission fully: it was to live a life dedicated to serving her fellowmen as a doctor in conflict-areas.
Travel Bag: Your knowledge, skills, and attitude
Food, drinks, medicines, and other travelling necessities are contained in a bag. Applying this concept to your life map, you also bring with you certain knowledge, skills, and attitudes. These determine your competence and help you in attaining your vision. Given such, there is a need for you to assess what knowledge, skills, and attitudes you have at present and what you need to gain along the way. This two-fold assessment will give you insights on your landmarks or measures of success. Jean realized that she needed to gain professional knowledge and skills on medicine so that she could become a doctor. She knew that she was a bit impatient with people so she realized that this was something she wanted to change.
Landmarks and Route: S.M.A.R.T. objectives
Landmarks confirm if you are on the right track while the route determines the travel time. Thus, in planning out your life, you also need to have landmarks and a route. These landmarks are your measures of success. These measures must be specific, measurable, attainable, realistic, and time bound. Thus you cannot set two major landmarks such as earning a masterís degree and a doctorate degree within a period of three years, since the minimum number of years to complete a masterís degree is two years. Going back to Jean as an example, she identified the following landmarks in her life map about time management skills: completing a bachelor’s degree in biology by the age of 21; completing medicine by the age of 27; earning her specialization in infectious diseases by the age of 30; getting deployed in local public hospitals of their town by the age of 32; and serving as doctor in war-torn areas by the age of 35. What do you think of time management skills?
Anticipate Turns, Detours, and Potholes
The purpose of your life map is to minimize hasty and spur-of-the-moment decisions that can make you lose your way. But oftentimes our plans are modified along the way due to some inconveniences, delays, and other situations beyond our control. Like in any path, there are turns, detours, and potholes thus; we must anticipate them and adjust accordingly. See more at time management.
